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Reflexive Pronouns in English: The Complete Guide

Reflexive Pronouns in English: Complete Guide
English Grammar

Reflexive Pronouns in English: The Complete Guide

Master the art of using yourself, themselves, and all reflexive pronouns

When do you say "I hurt myself" versus "I hurt me"? Why is "She made herself a sandwich" correct, but "She made her a sandwich" means something completely different? The answer lies in reflexive pronouns. These special words help us show when someone does something to themselves. Understanding them will make your English clearer and more natural.

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What Are Reflexive Pronouns?

Reflexive pronouns are special words that refer back to the subject of a sentence. They show that the person or thing doing the action is also receiving that same action. In simple terms, these pronouns tell us when someone does something to themselves.

The word "reflexive" comes from the idea of reflection, like looking in a mirror. Just as a mirror reflects your image back to you, reflexive pronouns reflect the action back to the person doing it. When you say "I taught myself to play guitar," the word "myself" reflects the action of teaching back to "I."

The Core Concept

Reflexive pronouns always end in either "-self" (for singular) or "-selves" (for plural). They match the subject of the sentence in person and number. This pattern makes them easy to recognize once you know what to look for.

These pronouns serve two main purposes in English. First, they show reflexive action where the subject and object are the same person or thing. Second, they emphasize who performed an action, adding extra focus to the subject. Both uses are common in everyday English.

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All Eight Reflexive Pronouns

English has exactly eight reflexive pronouns. Each one corresponds to a different subject pronoun and changes based on person and number. Learning all eight forms is essential for correct usage.

Myself /maɪˈsɛlf/ I → myself
Yourself /jʊrˈsɛlf/ You → yourself
Himself /hɪmˈsɛlf/ He → himself
Herself /hɜrˈsɛlf/ She → herself
Itself /ɪtˈsɛlf/ It → itself
Ourselves /ɑrˈsɛlvz/ We → ourselves
Yourselves /jʊrˈsɛlvz/ You (plural) → yourselves
Themselves /ðəmˈsɛlvz/ They → themselves

Notice the pattern. Singular reflexive pronouns end in "-self" while plural ones end in "-selves." The first part of each word matches its corresponding subject pronoun. For example, "him" becomes "himself" and "them" becomes "themselves."

Important: Forms like "hisself," "theirself," or "theirselves" are incorrect and nonstandard. Always use "himself" and "themselves" regardless of what you might hear in casual speech or regional dialects.

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How to Pronounce Reflexive Pronouns

Pronouncing reflexive pronouns correctly helps you sound natural and confident. The stress pattern is important because it affects how native speakers understand you.

Myself has stress on the second syllable: my-SELF. The first part sounds like the possessive "my," and the second part rhymes with "elf" and "shelf." Say it smoothly as one word, not two separate parts.

Yourself follows the same pattern: your-SELF. The stress falls on "self." In American English, the R in "your" is pronounced clearly. In British English, it is softer.

Himself is pronounced him-SELF with stress on the second syllable. The H is usually pronounced, though in very fast casual speech, some people drop it. Keep the H sound in formal contexts.

Herself follows the pattern her-SELF. The stress is on "self." The R sound varies between American and British English, just like in "her" alone.

Itself is pronounced it-SELF with equal stress on both parts or slightly more on "self." Keep it quick and smooth.

Ourselves is pronounced our-SELVES with stress on "selves." The "our" part sounds like "hour" in most accents. The ending "-selves" rhymes with "elves."

Yourselves follows the same pattern: your-SELVES. Stress the second syllable. This is the plural form, different from singular "yourself."

Themselves is pronounced them-SELVES with stress on "selves." The TH sound at the beginning is the voiced TH, the same as in "them," where your tongue touches your upper teeth and you vibrate your vocal cords.

💡 Pronunciation Tip

In natural conversation, reflexive pronouns are often unstressed and said quickly. However, when emphasizing who did something, native speakers stress the entire reflexive pronoun. Compare: "She cut herself" (neutral) versus "She cut herSELF!" (emphasizing it was her, not someone else).

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The History and Origin of Reflexive Pronouns

Reflexive pronouns have evolved significantly throughout the history of English. Their development reflects broader changes in how English grammar simplified over centuries.

Old English Period (450-1100)

Old English used different words for reflexive actions. Instead of compound forms like "myself," speakers simply repeated pronouns or used special reflexive forms. The word "self" existed but functioned differently, more like an adjective meaning "same" or "own."

Middle English Period (1100-1500)

Compound reflexive pronouns began forming by combining possessive adjectives with "self." Forms like "myself" and "thyself" appeared. However, usage was not standardized, and speakers sometimes used simple object pronouns for reflexive meaning, saying "me" instead of "myself."

Early Modern English (1500-1700)

Shakespeare's era saw reflexive pronouns becoming more standardized. "Himself" replaced earlier forms, and the pattern of using reflexive pronouns for both reflexive and emphatic purposes became established. The Bible translation in this period helped standardize these forms.

Modern English (1700-Present)

Reflexive pronouns stabilized into their current forms. Grammar books codified rules about when to use reflexive versus object pronouns. Regional variations still exist, but standard English has clear rules about reflexive pronoun usage.

The word "self" originally meant "same" in Old English. When combined with pronouns, it created emphasis: "I myself" meant "I, the same person." Over time, these combinations became single words with specialized grammatical functions. This historical development explains why reflexive pronouns feel more emphatic than simple object pronouns.

When to Use Reflexive Pronouns

Reflexive pronouns have specific uses in English. Understanding when to use them versus regular object pronouns is essential for correct grammar.

Use One: Reflexive Action (Same Subject and Object)

The primary use is when the subject and object of a sentence are the same person or thing. The action reflects back to the doer.

Reflexive Action Examples

I taught myself to cook.

She looked at herself in the mirror.

The cat cleaned itself after eating.

We prepared ourselves for the test.

They blamed themselves for the mistake.

In each example above, the person doing the action is also receiving it. The teacher and student are the same person. The viewer and the viewed are the same. This is true reflexive use.

Use Two: Emphasis (Highlighting Who Did It)

Reflexive pronouns can emphasize who performed an action. This intensive use adds extra focus without changing the basic meaning of the sentence.

Emphatic Examples

I myself don't believe it.

The president himself answered the phone.

We painted the house ourselves.

Did you make this yourself?

The children organized the party themselves.

In emphatic use, you could remove the reflexive pronoun and the sentence would still be grammatically complete. The pronoun just adds emphasis. "I don't believe it" is complete, but "I myself don't believe it" emphasizes that the speaker personally holds this opinion.

Use Three: After Prepositions (With Same Subject)

When a preposition is followed by a pronoun that refers to the subject, use the reflexive form.

After Prepositions

She bought a gift for herself.

He talks to himself sometimes.

I am proud of myself.

They kept the secret to themselves.

You should believe in yourself.

Use Four: After "By" (Meaning Alone)

The phrase "by + reflexive pronoun" means "alone" or "without help." This is a common idiomatic use.

By Yourself / Alone

I completed the project by myself.

She lives by herself.

The children stayed home by themselves.

Did you come here by yourself?

Common Verbs That Often Use Reflexive Pronouns

Certain verbs frequently appear with reflexive pronouns in English. Learning these common combinations will improve your fluency.

Enjoy yourself / yourselves

Have a good time. "We enjoyed ourselves at the party."

Help yourself / yourselves

Take what you want freely. "Please help yourself to snacks."

Behave yourself / yourselves

Act properly. "The children behaved themselves at dinner."

Hurt yourself / yourselves

Injure oneself. "Be careful not to hurt yourself."

Introduce yourself / yourselves

Tell others your name. "Let me introduce myself."

Teach yourself / yourselves

Learn without a teacher. "He taught himself Spanish."

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Important Rules and Distinctions

Reflexive pronouns follow specific rules that distinguish them from regular object pronouns. Understanding these rules prevents common mistakes.

Reflexive vs Intensive Use

The same reflexive pronouns serve two different functions. Knowing which is which helps you understand sentence structure.

Reflexive Use

She cut herself while cooking.

The reflexive pronoun is necessary. Without it, the sentence is incomplete or changes meaning.

Intensive/Emphatic Use

She herself cooked the meal.

The reflexive pronoun adds emphasis but could be removed. "She cooked the meal" is complete.

Must Match the Subject

Reflexive pronouns must agree with the subject in person, number, and gender. You cannot mix them up.

Correct Agreement

I see myself as a leader. (Not yourself or himself)

You should trust yourself. (Not myself or herself)

They bought themselves new phones. (Not ourselves or yourselves)

Cannot Be the Subject

Reflexive pronouns never function as the subject of a sentence in standard English. This is a common error among learners.

Myself went to the store.
I went to the store.
Himself and his wife arrived early.
He and his wife arrived early.

When NOT to Use Reflexive Pronouns

Many verbs that are reflexive in other languages are not reflexive in English. Native English speakers use regular object pronouns or no pronoun at all.

Do NOT Use Reflexive

I feel tired. (Not "I feel myself tired")

She stood up. (Not "She stood herself up")

We met at noon. (Not "We met ourselves at noon")

He shaved this morning. (Not "He shaved himself" unless emphasizing)

They washed before dinner. (Not necessarily "They washed themselves")

Verbs like "feel," "concentrate," "relax," "meet," "move," and many others that describe actions you naturally do to yourself do not require reflexive pronouns in English. Use them only when you need to emphasize the reflexive nature of the action.

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Common Mistakes to Avoid

Even advanced English learners make mistakes with reflexive pronouns. Recognizing these errors will help you avoid them in your own speech and writing.

Error One: Using Reflexive Pronouns as Subjects

This is perhaps the most common mistake. People sometimes use reflexive pronouns as subjects, especially in compound subjects.

My sister and myself went shopping.
My sister and I went shopping.
Yourself should call him back.
You should call him back.
💡 Quick Fix

Remove the other person from the sentence and see if the reflexive pronoun still sounds right. "Myself went shopping" sounds wrong, so "My sister and I" is correct, not "My sister and myself."

Error Two: Using Nonstandard Forms

Regional dialects sometimes use forms like "hisself," "theirself," or "theirselves." These are nonstandard and should be avoided in formal English.

He hurt hisself at work.
He hurt himself at work.
They should be proud of theirselves.
They should be proud of themselves.

Error Three: Wrong Agreement

The reflexive pronoun must match the subject. Mismatches create confusing or incorrect sentences.

You should ask yourself why I did it.
You should ask yourself why you did it.
Each student must introduce ourselves.
Each student must introduce himself or herself.

Error Four: Overusing Reflexive Pronouns

Some learners, especially those whose native languages use reflexive verbs more often, add reflexive pronouns where English does not need them.

I need to concentrate myself on my work.
I need to concentrate on my work.
She feels herself tired today.
She feels tired today.

Error Five: Using Reflexive After Verbs That Take Objects

When the subject and object are different people, do not use a reflexive pronoun.

She told myself the truth.
She told me the truth.
The teacher helped ourselves with the problem.
The teacher helped us with the problem.
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Tips for Mastering Reflexive Pronouns

Learning to use reflexive pronouns correctly takes practice. These strategies will help you build confidence and accuracy.

🔄 Strategy One: The Subject Match Test

Before using a reflexive pronoun, identify the subject. Ask yourself: "Is the person receiving the action the same as the person doing it?" If yes, use reflexive. If no, use a regular object pronoun. This simple test catches most errors.

📖 Strategy Two: Read Extensively

Exposure to correct usage is one of the best teachers. Read books, articles, and quality content. Notice when authors use reflexive pronouns versus regular object pronouns. Your brain will start recognizing patterns naturally through repeated exposure.

🎤 Strategy Three: Practice Common Phrases

Memorize common expressions that use reflexive pronouns: "enjoy yourself," "help yourself," "by myself," "pride myself on," "find yourself." These fixed phrases will become automatic, and you can build from there.

✏️ Strategy Four: Write and Check

Write sentences using each reflexive pronoun. Then check: Does the pronoun match the subject? Is it necessary or just emphatic? Could I remove it? This active practice with self-correction builds lasting understanding.

👂 Strategy Five: Listen to Native Speakers

Pay attention to how native speakers use reflexive pronouns in conversations, movies, and podcasts. Notice the contexts and the way they pronounce them. Listening trains your ear and helps you develop intuition about correct usage.

🔍 Strategy Six: Compare with Your Language

If your native language uses reflexive verbs differently than English, make a list of verbs that work differently. In English, we say "I feel tired" not "I feel myself tired." Knowing these differences prevents translation errors.

🗣️ Strategy Seven: Practice Emphasis

Try adding intensive reflexive pronouns to sentences for emphasis. "I did it" becomes "I did it myself." Feel the difference in meaning and tone. Understanding the emphatic use helps you appreciate how flexible reflexive pronouns can be.

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Reflexive Pronouns in Different Contexts

How you use reflexive pronouns can vary depending on whether you are writing formally, speaking casually, or using them for special emphasis. Understanding these variations helps you adapt to different situations.

In Formal Writing

Academic papers, business communications, and professional documents require precise reflexive pronoun usage. Follow all rules strictly and avoid casual variations.

Formal Examples

The committee members found themselves facing a difficult decision.

One must ask oneself whether this approach is ethical.

The organization prides itself on transparency and accountability.

In Casual Conversation

Everyday speech uses reflexive pronouns naturally and often in fixed expressions. The pronunciation may be less careful, and the usage more relaxed.

Casual Examples

I'm talking to myself again!

Make yourself at home.

They did it all by themselves.

Enjoy yourselves at the party!

For Special Emphasis

When you want to stress that someone personally did something, intensive reflexive pronouns add that emphasis powerfully.

Emphatic Use

The president himself called to apologize.

I myself witnessed the entire incident.

Did you write this essay yourself, or did someone help you?

Quick Reference: Subject to Reflexive Pronoun

I → myself I taught myself to code.
You → yourself Take care of yourself.
He → himself He introduced himself.
She → herself She blamed herself.
It → itself The door closed itself.
We → ourselves We enjoyed ourselves.
You (plural) → yourselves Help yourselves to food.
They → themselves They organized themselves.

🎓 Key Takeaways

  • Reflexive pronouns (myself, yourself, himself, herself, itself, ourselves, yourselves, themselves) refer back to the subject of a sentence
  • Use reflexive pronouns when the subject and object are the same person or thing: "I hurt myself"
  • Reflexive pronouns end in "-self" (singular) or "-selves" (plural) and must match the subject in person and number
  • Never use reflexive pronouns as the subject of a sentence in standard English
  • Avoid nonstandard forms like "hisself" or "theirselves" — always use "himself" and "themselves"
  • Intensive use adds emphasis: "I myself saw it happen" emphasizes personal witness
  • The phrase "by + reflexive pronoun" means alone or without help: "She did it by herself"
  • Many verbs that are reflexive in other languages do not require reflexive pronouns in English: "I feel tired" not "I feel myself tired"
  • Practice identifying the subject first, then check if the reflexive pronoun matches it correctly

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